This smile

I smile, can you see it? Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... nobody talks. They rather write up a complex set of lines describing what this is. Who are you my newcomer, why do you aspire to bring me tears? If I cry, all I am giving you is water, the rest is sold. You visitors think a lot before you plan to stay in here for your holidays. So what if the bed has got a funny spring, the food is warm and you get some good stories to take back home.

Let me sleep
you silly night
dont show up again
with your empty bag of dreams
memories, I rather forget
reflections of rusted silence
do I shout
when you knock my door?
I call you in
now let me relax
I have to knit together
some forgotten strings.

Shringi
June 23, 2010

The art of studying

Authors are true artists and books bliss. I love to study, find it artistic and wish to do stuff as a hobby - at leisure. The numbers, the alphabets, the cryptic knowledge excites me. I wish to be a student all my life but study only as a luxury. I like to solve things but not in a day, in ages. Well, I am not a brilliant kid and am going to discover nothing but often fantasize being able to read everything. I am forgetful and stupid but that's the fun part I blv, to learn when u know nothing. I am 24 and have below average knowledge compared to many but I am well adjusted with my level of brains. I would love you to teach me whatever you know. Its an art - to study. I love doing it and crave for more when I part from it.

As sure as I am that I wont be making any inventions, I am of not wanting to. Everyday comes with a moment of enlightenment and here I am living one. I keep telling people how important it is to be on time and have the right vision, do something to achieve something and do it for real. I stand outside of this philosophy of mine. I am happy to relax and laze in luxury or scarcity with no propulsion towards any kind of anything. I really peep into myself to find that all I need is a true personality that acts as a transparent gateway of pure knowledge, to learn and to give some. I want to move out of the institutions where they teach treachery along with maths and literature. Time to stand and live a life where you dont need to cheat at any level. There is nothing more important than to be who you want yourself to be. There is nothing more beautiful than to live an artful day, learn, study, sleep with a full mind and wake up empty. Friends come here, lets build something. Catch all that you can before you die in some storm, for you its money, for me the wind, for him it is some wood and for his son it is honey.

So it seems that I want to study all life and drink art. Well, to face it, as of now I am a loser who wants to do a million things but doesn't know really what. Do I have the courage to know my needs, what fulfills me, is their any profession that calls me to it. Why am I scared and unsure of myself. I want to do something I can do which I will be happy if coincides with what I dream to do.I have written too many words here so Johny tell me what you think. Being a nomad is a noble adventure.

After a lot of nonsense, I have decided that I will be a teacher like I have always wanted to be, teach what I know and learn what I don't. The plan is to grow.

Shringi

17 June 2010

Haiku of the day - girls and dreams

Two little damsels
hold hands and go to the jungle
to steal tiny sunbeams

Shringi
17 June 2010

Series

experiments
challenges
boredom
wisdom
fantasy

interrogations
solutions
offense
pretense
penalty

suggestions
complications
hassles
puzzles
possibility

ideas
deployments
races
chases
victory

Shringi
16 - june - 2010

Technical update

Since this is a non technical space, I will dwell only in the delight and certain facts of my latest tech endeavor. As many know I am building a haptic glove that dreams to give some feedback to the user when he tries touching a virtual object. It is fun.

After two weeks of implementing the finger tracking and collision detection of the fingers with the object, today, I jumped in phase two of the project i.e. actually building the glove. The feeling is the most satisfying I have ever had in my work life. Although I am nervous and unsure about my abilities, techniques and dedication, I am immensely excited to be a part of my imagination. This is the first time I am living my early morning fantasy in real. Shringi sitting in a lab, thinking, going away for a while, writing some code or getting together some hardware, making something work, getting frustrated on defeats, trying to explain roadblocks. This is a feeling which tells me I finally know what I want to do. Be an explorer.

I will be proud of myself only when I live on the rules of being real and honest and achieve what my raw self can. Rest any success that comes my way will not be enough to satisfy me.

The last two lines were unnecessary but it would be cruel to delete them.

Shringi
16 June 2010

Camera - Man

Its a bright day
there is sunshine on my face
I will sleep on ice with you
but wake up really soon
you can stay cozy with the snow around
I can smile and laugh looking at you

Time to ask
Do you have a camera?
can it click a picture of you under the moon
what an excellent camera it must be
to catch an eternal hold of you.

Shringi
15 - 06- 2010

Music

Now that I think of it, old hindi songs are really good. They are straight forward, simple on the music and beats and are easy. The videos add to their essence. Not that I was listening to any. You can call this an accidental encounter with one.

Mera mann tera pyaasa, mera mann

Shringi
June 15 2010

Glass

I can see you through a layer of thin glass. The glass reflects your past and the unknown present and you show me just what you have. You have time, body, emotions and nothing. If I were on the other side of the window, I would have missed on some valuable information on you. None the less, you are adorable.

Shringi
15/ 06/ 2010

Way

Living

I wonder how living is so important. To observe the beauty and dive into it, to acknowledge its filth and ignore it. To be a part of the free ocean. I dont know what our little lives are made up of, but it sure is incomplete. I believe, am sure that its going to be the same all life. Few fights, versions of love, confusion, guessing, laughter, boredom, pain and a series of breath. Thats why you are invited, all of you. Be intimate, intimidating, stupid, entertaining, play whatever character you want to, I dont wish to control too much. Why shall I even think of tomorrow when it doesnt really exist. I pretend too much to be scared cause I think its nice and simple to be so. Being brave gets too involving at times. What I want from any of you - knowledge, which you dont have, I want to know all your secrets which are not really secrets as you are an open book. All of us are open books, the readers too. We wait to be read not realising that our stories are the same which makes us too boring to be read. Aren't we mysterious to people who seek mystery? Yes, we are. Its not really our choice to show, the seeker is picking hints to spin his own story, to satisfy his hunger, to fill up his void. The secret is that this life never ends, we swap characters and build towards more existence, there is no separation, life and death are sisters, they sing hand in hand.

Shringi
15 - 06 – 10

Way

You really dont know when the door you are looking for is going to open. But I find it timid to knock each door I see. I would rather walk a random path irrespective of obstacles or doors. I wish to land in a land I know nothing about but be an expert which for that land is ordinary. You, you and you can hold my hand but believe me I dont know where I will take you and will sense less when your hands swap with unknown travelers.

Play your role. Make sure you are paid when the show is over. I am not in favor of taking favors. Thank you.

Shringi
June 15 2010

American beauty 1999

I am in the middle of this movie American beauty and I cant help getting disgusted. I havent seen a better bunch of losers. they dont know who they are, what they want, why they want it, do they really want what they dont know. I am going to finish it and not talk about it ever.

After 3/4 of the movie. Its actually good, but too striking

10 mins away from the end and I am not happy seeing what I am seeing. Truth adulterates my imagination.

The movie is over. It was good.

Shringi
15 June 2010

I am in emotions

beauty!
simple, more sad
music falls into place
ken expands
what kind of an enemy
this wisdom is
feeding the brain with unwanted arrays
I am in emotions
dimensions are useless

beauty!
special, more abstract
dance follows the beats spread
sky bends
what kind of a dilemma
this freedom is
crafting chiliad unwanted doors for the soul to escape
I am in emotions
delineations, need to be perfect.

Shringi
June 14, 2010

Uljhan

Is uljhan ke bahar
mai kaise aa giri
pyari si kahani
kyu khatam ho gayi
ab khud ko kis uljhan
ke jhoole mei jhulau
kaise is jhooth mooth ki sachai
ko dobara dhundhla banau

Shringi
June 14, 2010

Har rang ki kahani

Soch ke unchue pehlu mei doobi
mai, is natak ki abhinetri
dhoondhti hu
har rang mei ek kahani
sochti hu ki dhadkano ki is mala mei
kuch to raaz hoga
jo tum bekhabar, sunte ho
jo mai bekhabar, sunati
har rang ki meri hi koi kahani

jin panno pe tumhari tasveer thi
uspe to rang, kala gir gaya
un panno ko saaf karti
mai sochti ki tumhara rang asli kya hai
wohi jo maine samjha
ya wo jo tumne samjhaya

Is natak ki mai keval ek abhinetri
rang mere kirdar ka darpan
mai rango ki kahani nahi.

Shringi
07 June 2010